April 5, 2016

Among the very valid reasons God wants our minds off this world is that it will constantly disappoint us. The widow with the 2 small copper coins gave more than the rich in the room. Jesus said it’s because she gave out of her poverty while the latter out of their abundance. Let me turn this the other way round to illustrate how and why friendships, property, children, spouses and any form of security can never satisfy. Those who gave plenty gave out of abundance and the world lacks that which we seek hence it cannot give what it does not have.

I have had high expectations on people, even now I still do. I expect people to be honest and mean what they say. I expect everyone to be conscious of their future and plan now, save that extra mpesa transaction money, that weekend alcohol bill and take a bus instead of a flight if they have no rush – the goal is the destination right? I want people to read my mind and know I mean well even if it doesn’t show on my face. Expectations, from a world that doesn’t have much to give if any at all. Am looking to people who harbor hurt & pain to love me back, who suffer rejection to openly accept me, people who don’t know the future to acknowledge that am on the right path. Am looking for approval, dependency, stability and security in an ever changing world. Am looking for a constant – relationships that will last forever, a pocket that won’t run dry, health that won’t deteriorate, knowledge that will stay on my fingertips. Am chasing the wind, and heck I want to be fit but am getting weary instead. Am always disappointed and my secondary appraisal is to blame them that have let me down. I spend too much energy fixing my perspective on people who don’t see eye to eye with me. Then I end up thinking maybe it’s actually me with the problem and not them.

Yesterday, the bulb went off and I not only saw the light but perceived it. I heard the voice but then again this time I understood – the moment we shift focus from God to people, we can only expect less of what we are because lets be honest, there’s not much to rejoice within us either. We make promises we don’t keep, we pass judgment, we silently scorn others and even in our thoughts we err. If I can’t give as much, I shouldn’t expect to receive any. So the next time you are disappointed in someone/a circumstance look within yourself and see the much you lack, then draw to God who has much more to give than you are willing to receive – not another relationship, job, career, town. They will still disappoint.

“Cursed is the one who trusts in man and makes flesh his strength & whose hurt turns away from the Lord” Jeremiah 17:5

“Do not wear yourself out to get rich; have the wisdom to show restraint. Cast but a glance at riches and they are gone, for they will surely sprout wings and fly off to the sky like an eagle” Proverbs 23:4-5 NIV

“Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things” Col 3:2 NIV

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