The last time I had nausea for like forever I was persuaded it was for a good cause. I ‘snacked’ on crackers, ginger nuts, pepper smeared on mango and corn. I slept on cold slab to ease the discomfort. This week I came down with a cold, strong enough to send me to the chemist on self prescription. These are among the adverse reactions to the medication am on: nausea, insomnia, weakness, dizziness, restlessness, flushing and difficulty in micturition. I certainly don’t know what the last one means, I think I’d rather not find out because the moment I do, it will be the first reaction I get prior to taking the meds. As soon as the 10ml Ascoril and 1 capsule of amoxil hit my system I feel different, undoubtedly depressed. Am continuing with the meds to finish the dose as instructed, I have no physical pain, neither do I feel weak nor a shred of insomnia, I just feel depressed. Today I figured out why. Am expecting a side effect that doesn’t even come with the meds, & am getting plenty of it.
This week I bagan a devotional series – Surprised by God. One afternoon –if there’s even anything like this- my spirit was overwhelmed. What happens when we pray “Lord give me insight/understanding” then He does & we don’t like what we see/hear.
Habakkuk in the bible asked God to listen to his prayers for his people (he was a priest in Judah) who were being oppressed because they had sinned against God. In His response, God indicated that He would use the ruthless Babylonians to wage war against the people of Judah “I am going to do something in your days that you would not believe even if you were told. I am raising up the Babylonians, that ruthless and impetuous people……..”Habakkuk 1. That must have been depressing for Habakkuk to hear.
I love how the book ends though, Habakkuk 3:17&18
Though the fig tree does not bud
And there are no grapes on the vines
Though the olive crop fails
And the fields produce no food
Though there are no sheep in the pen
And no cattle in the stalls
Yet I will rejoice in the Lord
I will be joyful in God my savior
Sometimes we pray and God reveals more than we had in mind, we pray for our spouses and the focus shifts to who we ought to be ourselves – gentle & quiet. Sometimes He changes our discussion to areas He desires more than our chasing after the wind. Sometimes it’s too overwhelming we miss the whole point.
A paraphrased excerpt from the devotional study.
“A British Scientist in India was greatly troubled by the Hindu custom of drinking water from the river Ganges, considered by them to be sacred. He invited a leading Hindu priest to look at a drop of the water through a microscope to see how polluted and harmful it was. As the priest looked through the eyepiece and saw the magnified foreign bodies, he picked up the microscope and threw it on the floor, causing it to break into a dozen pieces. It was the response of ignorance and misunderstanding to the healing light. He smashed the instrument but he had not cleansed the water”
O Father, help me to not be afraid of the light, even when it burns… Amen.